Is there an extra disclaimer we're not seeing?

So what good will mods do? Can mods disperse such matters? Can mods avoid drama? See the more the forum grows the more I realize perhaps I need to start focusing on the rules I have set. Well that's what I'm currently thinking, perhaps a good night sleep might provide better ideas, not sure but it's something I'll definitely have in the back of my head.

 

You're doing a great job Carlos but I have to admit that as the forum grows, you'll definitely need some help in the form of moderators. Otherwise all of your time will be eaten up by managing forums alone.

Oh and you can definitely lock this thread and just take it to PMs. :thumb:

 

Yes, I do agree with you guys. I'll definitely need some help with the forum, but I'm quite attached to the forum...letting go of it even a little is going to hard for me.

 

Hehe, well just be sure that when you do look for help that you really trust the people you choose.

 

Well it's quite late now, I've got lots to think about...mean wile...I'm going to leave this thread open and like I've repeatedly said feel free to share, what ever you want, let it all out because once I close this thread things will be different around here. Not sure exactly how things will progress from here on, I'm referring as to weather should I go the route "..my house my rules.." type of mentality or should I maintain the course "open forum". I'll definitely give it some thought, consult Calgarydetail, sneek and DB Boss, I'm sure DB Boss will have an ear full to share with me next time I see him lol...and most importantly my wife, I find my wife has some great advice when I need it most.

Well I would say try to keep the drama contained but at this point, I say bring it on, let it all out, I'm a grown man I can deal with it and if I cant well that's why I have a team assembled to provide some feed back and guidance.

 

Mods will help enforce the rules when these situations arise. You cant be online all the time to enforce your rules on how each is to conduct themselves. If there is a confrontation between members they will beable to lock the thread or get the thread back on topic and have the said parties work it out in PMs off the board.

 

I would be willing to help:gidiup:

 

Carlos, Integrity said it best and echoes my sentiment word for word

 

I have seen lots of drama on another forum I have been a member of for over 4 years.

Moderators can help. They are allowed to delete/remove foul language, rude comments, NSFW content like pics, etc.

It does help alot. especially as a forum grows.

Carlos, as the forum grows, you will find it increasingly harder to control or "moderate".

As far as members wanting a larger PM folder, it should be larger if they are a "paying" member. That helps maintain and run a site. Problems occur, and it takes time and money to fix them, like software updates, server issues etc.

I have been a paying member on "the other forum" I belong to from day1. And I am proud of it.

Good luck and I hope this can be resolved in a peaceful manner.

btw, I would be willing to become a "moderator" if it comes to be.

 

also, if a thread can not be resolved in the thread or PM's then it should be locked before it goes too far.

Some members will get burned if it gets out of hand and it can cause members to leave or some from even wanting to come here.

I don't remember how I discovered this forum, but I am glad I came here. I can deal with more drama than most, because of the different "fields" I have worked in, including being in the military.

 

First of all Carlos, we all appreciate the time and money that you spend keeping this forum up and running. Everyone who is a member here shares that sentiment.

The forum has grown by leaps and bounds. We have a lot of members and a lot of people are checking these forums multiple times a day. I personally don't mind a little drama every once in a while. It's healthy and we're all grown men and women, we can work it out and get through it. I don't want you to spend 24 hours a day monitoring this forum, you have a family that you need to spend time with and a full-time job that requires your attention as well!

So in a nutshell, I say you get a few admins to help you out and let a little bit of a drama happen in the forum, most of it is harmless. Unless it's a direct attack on a member, well, then the mods can step in and take care of it.

What do you think?

 

One thing is for sure this is one of the best forums I belong to, the one thing that I believe is you don't want to have another senario like this one. Carlos (Nica) as has been said a few times "without you this forum would not exist "and I do appreciate everything you do for your fellow detailers. Keep up the good work and you have my support.

 

My thoughts exactly. I'm very active on a forum totally unrelated to detailing (Online Rep for a company) and until you have companies suing board members and mods or people actually locating someone and doing physical harm to them you haven't seen drama. The stuff quantified as drama around here is childs play and nothing more than people not agreeing on something. I call that debate, not drama. IMO its part of a healthy and functioning forum/message board because not everyone is going to agree on everything all of the time (for example: I thought Mindflux's thread was very humorous and you didn't from that a healthy debate could have sprung up) . Most of the time these threads work themselves out to a point of a resolution. But not all the time and thats when moderation is needed. Now when the debate gets to a point were people are rendering insults, calling names or being threatening in anyway (e-toughness) than yeah thats going to far and has no place in this or any other forum. I agree with some of the others that at a 1000 member mark a couple of MODS to assist you might not be a bad idea. But to that end objectivity and common restraint from prematurely silencing people by bannings or locking threads( like the one that spawned this thread as IMO there was no need to lock it..) for a simple debate or misunderstanding can turn people off as well. But in the end its your forum to do as you please.

I will say this is by far the best detailing site on the net IMO and you've done a hell of a job with it! This subject is a little in the gray area and oft times has no clear solution so you just have to be fair and do whats best for you and your site. Good luck!

 

ill take the job on (TRHLAND) super mod:thumb:

 

First of all I would like to re-emphasize what many have already said in that I really appreciate what Nica has established here and like Integrity said its his house so we play by his rules.

Now my take on what happened can be equated to a sort of analogy. Its like throwing some trash out of your car window while going down the road (that would be the M105 thread). You get pulled over by a police officer and he doesn't want to be a hard ass so he issues you a warning ticket for littering, no fine or real ticket just a warning ticket (this would be Nica's warning and closing of the M105 thread). Well you are not pleased even with just the warning and really just don't want to let it go so you take the warning ticket and in front of the officer you ball it up and walk to a trash can on the curb and throw it away right in front of the officer (this would be starting the Mixology thread). Was the trash can the appropriate place for a balled up piece of paper that just happened to be the warning ticket? Yes it was (much like the off topic forum is the appropriate forum for things not related to detailing). Was it very inappropriate and disrespectful to throw away the warning right in front of the officer that was trying to cut you some slack? Yes it was (much like the Mixology thread was in coming right on the heels of the closed M105 thread). Most adults would wait until they got home and throw away the warning ticket and consider it a lesson learned, however a few would choose the above scenario just to make one last thumb of the nose to authority.

If the Mixology thread was geared as some say as humor and satire, I just don't buy it. The timing of it was merely to illicit more controversy over a thread that had been closed and couldn't be propagated anymore. If it was to be nothing more than humor why not wait a month and then post it. Why not because it wouldn't have been funny without the implications to the closed M105 thread, so therefore it was a concerted effort to establish more drama with the hopes of bringing in the other parties from the M105 thread. Nica stepped in before that could happen and I for one am glad he did.

 

this whole thread and the issue behind it will be the death of this forum.

Message boards aren't here for the owners/admin. They are here for the users. Ultimately, this board is just like our business. Without car owners and their cars, there would be no need for us.

DB isn't a necessity, because there are 11ty billion other websites that have some sort of detailing section, if not a whole detailing site altogether. But it is a place that many people enjoy coming. The overall attitude of this thread and the whining by the admin about all of this is bringing the board down. My suggestion is if you're going to close the thread, then close it. And leave it alone. Close it and say it's closed. That's it.

 

I for one am not going to leave. :bla2:

 

Not necessarily... it will definitely affect DB but it won't bring it down. How many online forums have you participated in of this caliber? It's a shame that all of the ones you seem to encounter, judging by your statement, end in a downward spiral.

Sure the message boards are for the users but that doesn't mean that owner/administrators/moderators can't participate and have their say as well. That'd be like the president of the U.S. not being able to voice his opinion even though he does work for the U.S. Government.

In the thick of it all, theoretically yes DB isn't a necessity but you also have to consider perspective. What might not be a necessity for you may be a necessity for another. Sure there are plenty of other detailing forums or forums with detailing sub-forums but all of them are unique in themselves. Think of it this way, there are so many cars out there and they're all different. Cars aren't a necessity theoretically but we all have our preferences to certain vehicles and they all do the same thing - transport.

 

I'm sorry JRock10 but I'm not the one complaining here, I think you need to re-read the entire thread. Reading your posts made me laugh a little becuase your comparing two things that are completely the opposite...yes the forum is member oriented but if the members choose to leave I wouldn't loose any money, I'm not in this for the money, I'm in this to provide a place for my detailing friends and any one who chooses to join the forum to hang out, sit back put here feet up in the air and share. What ever they wish to share.

If people stop purchasing vehicle, you would be out on the street...if members don't sign up it's no skin of my back, it wont effect me what so ever.

Now you say the following "...My suggestion is if you're going to close the thread, then close it. And leave it alone. Close it and say it's closed. That's it." well that's what I have been doing and that's what Mindflux is complaining about that I'm not letting member express there concerns, to be perfectly honest with you. Your missing the point here. Perhaps on your next post on this particular thread make sure what you post is in fact relevant to the thread before you post it.

 

Now, I'll be perfectly honest with the members here. The night this thread was started and things were expressed I hardly slept, not because of Mindflux and this thread, no not at all..but beucase I went back to the root of things, the beginning of Detailing Bliss.

I asked my self, why did I start Detailing Bliss? The question had me stumped for a few hours, I stared at my Mac for hours that night trying to come up with an answer, well needless to say I fel asleep and I still didn't have an answer. I got up went to work and all day the question lingered in my head....why did I start Detailing Bliss?

Then on the way home it dawned on me, I started Detailing Bliss because I wanted a place/space for members to be able to express them selves with out being frown upon, with out feeling little or being belittled, for members to feel welcome. I have done my best to maintain such an environment and for the most part I've been successful, now I can't take all the credit because there are many members here, members which I'm proud to call friends now that have helped me mould, shape Detailing Bliss to what it has become.

Then I started going over my head, what exactly is Mindflux trying to say to me and this is what I came up with. Mindflux is saying that I claim that Detailing Bliss is an open forum yet I'm going around closing threads not letting members have a say on topics that are posted up. The other topic that Mindflux touched on and made me aware of is that up to this date, I have been avoiding the chain of command here at Detailing Bliss. Now I did this on purpose why? Well to be honest I wanted members to see me as nothing more then just a regular member, to not feel intimidated to contact me, to send me private message when they had questions or concerns. I want members to feel as though there input is valuable and will be recognized and that I will never ignore a suggestion.

Well this is where the light bulb turned on and I finally realized something. Up to this date, I've been avoiding my true role here at Detailing Bliss, yes I'm the owner, yes I'm the one paying for the forum with my hard earned money and as such I had set rules for this forum, I have welcomed everyone that has joined this forum with open arms and I have tried very hard to make everyone feel at home. I have tried to be patient and have tolerated quite a bit but what do I get in return? Well for the most part most members appreciate and recognize my efforts but at the same time there are others that fail to see my efforts and then what integrity said came to me. I'll never be able to please every one here, I may please majority of the members but as the forum grows so do the different point of views/mentalities.

Yes, I agree with you guys I will need help to run Detailing Bliss and that's why I have Calgarydetail and sneek helping me out and I chose to label them and my self DB Representatives, once again trying to avoid the authority labeling here. In reality Calgarydetail and sneek are in deed moderators and my self I'm the boss, I'm the one who runs the show around here, I'm the one who sets the tone to this place, I'm the one who sets the rules, Calgarydetail and sneek are responsible to uphold my rules but you see it's not just Calgarydetail, sneek and my self. There are so many members here that have helped build and grow Detailing Bliss that I felt it wasn't necessary to go on a power/title trip and belittle anyone. I see now that even though I have the outmost respect to every single member here I have to assume my role here at Detailing Bliss and so do Calagarydetail and sneek. As the forum continues to grow, I will require more help from members here, I will pick who is to help me moderate Detailing Bliss and I will choose not based on a popularity contest but on individuals that share and understand my vision for Detailing Bliss.

Now I don't want to go to the extreme of this is my house these are my rules if you don't like it get out. No, I really don't want to get to that level, in fact I would have to agree, I need to let members work there issues out by them selves. Having said that when some one reports a thread to me I am obligated to act and for the most part I feel I have acted accordingly, I post and try to diffuse the situation, now some members here may disagree with that statement but I asure you my intentions are pure and I indeed do mean to divert/difuse hostility here. Ultimately it’s true, I have the authority to act as any way I see fit and if you question my actions then I welcome a private message expressing your concerns. I welcome individuals to question my actions, after all I’m only human and I do make mistakes and I’m not a proud man who can’t admit to his mistakes. However, if after private messaging we still don’t see eye to eye or come to some sort of agreement and you feel I still acted inappropriate and I feel the opposite I can and will say the following "I'm sorry but this is how I'm choosing to run my forum, if you don't like it there are many other forums for you to choose from".

Now before I get to such extremes, it's important to know that I will consult with Calgarydetail and sneek, prior to any harsh decisions or any kind of discipline decisions. The intention here is to minimize on temperamental reactions/decision making and besides three heads/point of views are better then one.

Now, threads like the one Mindflux started will never stop, it's the nature of the beast, things will settle down, things may or may not be forgotten and members may or may not move on but one day maybe in a month or two or three months another thread will pop up with drama...but you know what we are all mature individuals and I'm going to let the members work there problems out however, I do have rules here and if you break any of my rules we will deal with you as we (Calgarydetail, sneek and my self) see fit.

Now having said all this Calgarydetail, sneek and my self will get together go over the rules I originally posted when I created Detailing Bliss and modify any rules we feel need modification and add any new rules we feel need to be added. The intention here is that we will create guidelines for moderators to follow and for members to follow as well.

To conclude, I think I understand what Mindflux was trying to say to me but I’m still waiting for Mindflux to contact me via private message so we can conclude this matter. I await for your private message. Should you choose not to send me a private message that is fine too, but by not doing so you have proven to me that your intentions here were not pure at all and that all you wanted to do is stir the pot. Well at least I've gained more knowledge to help me march along with Detailing Bliss.