Darwin Awards 2009

Discussion in 'Detailing Bliss Lounge' started by agpatel, Jan 29, 2010.

  1. agpatel

    agpatel OD On Detailing

    Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honouring the least evolved among us.

    Here is the glorious winner:

    1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California would-be robber
    James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down
    the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

    And now, the honourable mentions:

    2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a
    claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself.
    He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

    3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a
    woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

    4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be
    transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and
    offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients
    were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days

    5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train.
    When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a
    moving train before he was hit.

    6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
    the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled,
    leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15. [If someone points a gun at you and gives you money,
    is a crime committed?]

    7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window,
    grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be
    thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

    8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
    woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and
    drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's
    her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

    9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan at 5 A.M., flashed a gun,
    and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion
    rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

    10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for..
    Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man
    admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle
    declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

    In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends and family....unless of course one of these individuals by
    chance is a distant relative or long lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost.

    *** Remember.... They walk among us!!!***
     
  2. dankfanatic

    dankfanatic Guest

    LMAO! nice post
     
  3. slanguage

    slanguage OD On Detailing

    LMFAO. that was great. thanks for sharing.
     
  4. Dust2Glory

    Dust2Glory Nuba Guru

    Man that is just great!! Sometimes I wonder if some people didn't form from puddles of crap
     
  5. pektel

    pektel DB Forum Supporter

    I don't know where he came from, but that's where the gas siphoner ended up.
     
  6. agpatel

    agpatel OD On Detailing

    haha, glad yall like it...some of those had me on the floor laughing.
     
  7. Cooter

    Cooter Guest

    And the best news of all. These crazy ppl are breeding!!! God loves crazy ppl which explains why there are so many!
     
  8. agpatel

    agpatel OD On Detailing

    If the world didnt have crazy people then who would entertain us? :applause2:
     
  9. Misha

    Misha Nuba Guru

    i like #6
    can they charge robbery for this? or it would be something along lines of flashing a gun or something? since he didnt take any money
     
  10. SSTG

    SSTG DB Forum Supporter

    LOL, thanks man.
     
  11. Bunky

    Bunky Guest

    I am sure he could be charged with attempted robbery. It would be interesting to see what charges were filed on the violent crimes and if they received jail time.
     
  12. ahwil_lim

    ahwil_lim Wax on..Wax off

    nice to read :applause2:

    I like #6 & #9 ... 5star stupidity award wkakaka .... :giggle:
     
  13. P1et

    P1et Official DB Moderator

    Excellent read, number 9 and 10 are my favorites!
     

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