Hey guys, I dont know if this is the place but I feel closer to many of you than I do others I surround myself with in everyday life. And I also hate to put a damper on lifemal's upcoming marriage but I am going to be breaking up with a girl I have been with for about 2 years now and I love her to death but I have more doubts than I need to have and I know its the right thing to do. I just keep making excuses of why I want to be with her and I can't keep doing it. If this is not appropriate feel free to delete this thread but all words of wisdom and advice truly do matter to me. On a lighter note it is midnight here and the only thing to help me clear my mind is to detail my mom's new Infiniti FX35, and I promise to post pics soon. Thanks everyone. Chas
Well bud. Having been in your situation more times than I care to divulge, I can say that if you are do feel breaking up is what needs to happen than do it and get on with your life. It won't be any easier a week, month or even a year from now. Breaking up sucks, no two ways about it but its better for both of you to get it over with. Keep yourself busy doing things you enjoy ( not her of course! ) and it'll be a lot easier.
Life is full of Heart-Aches, theres no way around it. I'm not sure how old you are, and I guess it really doesn't matter. Breaking Up/Divorce/ Death can be a devastating time for anyone. All I can really say is Time heals all Wounds, or at least the Wounds don't sting as bad as time passes. How about a few 1 liners to cheer you up > :applause2: A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to Hell, and you look forward to the trip Worrying Works!, 90% of the things I worry about never happen With sufficiant thrust, pigs fly just fine I got in a fight one time with a very big guy, and he said"I'm gonna mop the floor with you face" I said "You'll be sorry" He said "Oh yea? why" I said "Well, you won't be able to get in the corners very well" Nostagila is not what it use to be Your never to old to learn something stupid I used to be indecisive, now I'm not sure
hmmm now sure what happened but I wrote a response and saw it and now its not here anymore... Anyway what I said was just the other day my prof was talking and said the following: "If you have to make excuses to stay with a girl day in and day out then it is not meant to be. Just remember one thing, look past her and you will see another girl that is just as smart and is just as pretty than she is but just a better fit." Now dont ask me how in a mechanical engineering class we got on topic is not relevant but having been were you are it is tough to do what you need to do even though every part of you knows what you truly have to do. Just be honest with her and then keep going on with your life till someone else comes up. It is just trial and error in the simplistic sense, like polishing try combination till you get the perfect one. (he thought I add that in there) The right pad and polish combination will give amazing results but if you are off by a little you still get good results but you are not truly happy about it.
what it comes down to for me is just that she makes me someone that I am not and everyone around me notices it and I have been blind to it for so long and told myself it was ok and it isnt. You are right agpatel I cant keep making excuses and when I see past her I feel like I see good things, I just need to man up and be honest with her. 911Fanatic- you are right too, I keep telling myself it will be easier later but in all reality its going to make it harder. Flash- hahahaha those words definitely cheered me up, I couldn't stop laughing
If you know for certain that your better off without her, you owe it to the both of you to move on. Be strong and dont fall back to her when you feel lonely and depressed.
If a girl argues with me, I do this: YouTube - Family Guy - Peter has spoken! Yea, I'm classy like that.
You know, the last time I broke it off with a woman was my ex fiance, about 2 months before our wedding. I just could not feel right with her and had some lingering doubts. I called it off, sent her packing and went out and bought a motorcycle. I love that motorcycle. We never fight..lol. You are young, you will rebound, you will be fine. Just remember, better to be cautious than divorced..and paying alimony.
Couldn't have said it better myself Spyral!! Chas, as you can see it's a normal part of life. Sometimes we like to believe that our love is complete only to find out that our hearts are not really there. If you have doubts then you should be honest with yourself. While it may feel like the world is ending, it truly is beginning. It's like the saying "when one door closes, another one opens up". You know yourself that when you see beyond her you see a much brighter picture. You see you and not the puppet she wants you to be. Long ago I use to wonder why me and whoever at the time didn't stay together. I thought for sure we would get married and the whole shabang. My point is, I'm happily married with a daughter and I realized that all those girls were never meant for me. She was my horizon beyond all the others. Your time will come when you will find that someone who completes you. I can't tell you how you'll know, but you'll know. In the meantime be productive and channel those emotions into something that will propel you forward. Were here for you.:itsok: Now MAN UP yourself and close this chapter :support:! The sooner you do it the sooner you can move on. You'll be glad you did.
^ i agree. i know its sucks man Ive been with my girl for almost 2 years and I cant see myself being without her. But ive been in your situation before, you need to move past this as many have said before. Go out with some buddies have a drink or 2 (dont get crazy w/ the alcohol) and relax. If you can afford it take a mini vacation and just breathe. Take some time to do what you love, (detailing, driving, drinking, but those are just my 3 D's, but never do the last 2 together lol) anyways cheer up get out there meet new people and you'll be sure to find someone else as dadswrld said. Hope everything works out.
Bro, my best friend just broke up with his girlfriend that he's been dating for about 3 years.. So I kind of know how it feels and I'm sure we are all here for you if you need someone to talk to. Sometimes man, the right decision is the hardest to make. Maybe you guys need some time off before you both realize how much you love each other? Or maybe you're just waiting for Ms. Right. I am sure you will find someone you will love forever if its not the girl you've just broken up with, it might be the next girl you meet, whatever the case might be, just know where here to support you and push you forward and talk to you when the clouds are gray. Now, that FX35 better look gleeming, brotha!
Im sorry but unless you are a well established coke dealer you will NEVER be able to afford alimony AND your detailing arsenal upkeep. :afro: And I have no new advice to add to your situation Chas. Everybody here seemed to hit the nail on the head. If you came here looking for reassurance I think you got it. Dont ever doubt yourself! Best of luck buddy:thumb:
Bud, you're not putting a damper on my marriage at all. If she's not the one -- she's not the one. I know too many people who have stayed with the same girl for years and years knowing they didn't want to marry her. Possibly because it was a reliable piece of ass, because it was comfortable and known to them, I don't know. I've never agreed with it. The moment I've known I wasn't going to marry a girl I was dating, I cut it off. After all, that's what dating is all about. So I'm sorry to hear that you're breaking up with her, but it sounds like it's the right move for you happiness. I'm sure it will work out and you'll meet someone even more incredible. PM me if you need anything bud
Dude, I'm going to give you some sage advice: If you're having doubts, and there are no permanent ties (i.e. kids), then just get out and move on. Don't be afraid of being alone or anything. Because you obviously can get a girlfriend if you want one. I enjoyed being single, and I enjoy my relationship I'm in now. She puts up with all my crap, and doesn't complain too much about me being out in the garage detailing. A question you also have to ask yourself is how perfect do you expect someone to be? I mean, do you hit on 19? Oh, and nothing gets you over the next one like getting under the next one.
Hey guys thanks for all the great advice I can't tell you how much I truly appreciate it. I know its the right thing to do and a friend of mine gave me some great advice and I know some of you have said it, if shes meant to be then it will be meant to be later on but I definitely need to move on with my life now and I am looking forward to the future and keeping optimistic. Will be makin my move pretty soon so wish me luck.
One thing that cheers me up is buying detailing supplies... can be a very expensive fix to get stuck on..
me and my wife actually had a talk about that, and she actually had a point there. She told me she doesn't care about me spending money, she just hates seing stuff unused, sitting in garage...
I don't know if this will help you at all buy I will share some of my experiences. I was with the same girl from the age of 16 to 24..thought she was going to be the one up until I was about 22. It was amazing how in the last two years of our relationship we became two totally different people having known one another for so long. It was a hard split, but a happy one at the same time bc I got to live closer to my family again (I had lived in Florida with her). I thought relationships were over, had some very bad times trying to find what I thought was love. Came to the conclusion I was just going to stop looking for a while and that is when my wife found me and I have been so happy since then, after a year of soul searching she found me in December of 05. Everything happens for a reason, I just know right now you are probably so confused though but it will get better for you.
